How A Church Plant Really Feels

Yesterday, I wrote a letter to a fellow church planter about my reflections on church planting after a year at it. Some highlights:

First off, it's been hard. Much harder than Rachel or I could ever have imagined. I'm in a pretty constant state of over my head.

Secondly, it's been worth it. I've started to realize that when Jesus directed Peter to take the boats into deeper water, it was because being out of your depth is the best place to begin real fishing.

Im loving this even as I'm overwhelmed by it.

I'm 30 years old, and I'm the oldest member and lead pastor of my church.

I feel like a Timothy in need of a Paul.

I'm feeling the pressure of something that feels very new and the importance of connecting to something very old. I see the importance of learning new things without throwing out all the old.

I want to embrace the "I don't know" mystery of faith without losing the "this I know" basis for it.

I'm trying to shepherd a community in being disciples and disciple making, in bringing people to Jesus and being Jesus to people. I'm seeking and exploring and reading and praying and talking and listening and trying to lead and trying to follow.

Most of the time I feel like a dumb kid with a whole lot left to learn.

I heard a professor and theolgian say recently that the emerging churches and church plants are discovering that "there are no experts at this."

That is frightening in that I could use some experts and it's freeing in that I don't have to pretend to be one. I wanted to put this out there for any pastor, preacher, teacher, disciple and/or believer who ever felt like they were barely keeping their head above water. If it were just me and my "little faith" I would be drowning. Fortunately, Jesus is always there to save me.