Drunk

I've never been drunk.


I don't share that self-righteously, I've just never seen the appeal. Maybe I've been around too many people when they were drunk or heard their next day apologies and regrets.


But, for the last two days, I've seen the appeal. I want to get drunk. I want to drink until I'm not feeling what I'm feeling, until I can forget the last two days, my pain, and my name.


Now I know that Marx would say that religion is its own opiate and that many of you would agree, but it's Jesus that has kept me sober. Jesus whose example shows that reality is better dealt with than avoided. That our plans for escaping the difficult stuff are what really lead to our destruction. 


So, I woke up today and will wake up tomorrow and will face reality, with all its confusion and pain.


But don't be too impressed. Because it's only by Christ's example and Christ's strength that I do it.


Because it's 11:36 and my brain won't rest and there's a bottle of sipping whiskey in the cupboard.


And I really just want to get drunk.